Why Kids Quit Sports: Falling Out of Love with the Game

My360Mindset Coach
Oct 20
3 min read

By Dr. Tony Tucci, PsyD – Director of Sport Psychology, My360Mindset

The Moment It Starts to Slip

Every season, we see it. A once-passionate athlete starts dragging their feet to practice. They’re not smiling as much. They talk about “being done.”

It’s easy to think it’s about burnout, coaches, or schedules—but often, it starts long before that.

Somewhere along the way, the joy faded. The pressure built. And the game stopped feeling like theirs.

When “Love of the Game” Gets Lost

Kids start sports because they love to move, compete, and connect. They stay because it’s fun, challenging, and social.

But over time, that love can erode—especially when the focus shifts from growth to outcomes.

Here’s how it often happens:

Every mistake feels like failure. Instead of learning, they feel judged.
Games feel like tryouts. They start playing not to lose instead of playing to win.
Pressure outweighs play. The fun parts—friends, laughter, and excitement—get replaced by anxiety and fear of disappointing others.

This doesn’t happen overnight. It happens in small moments: the sigh after a turnover, the tension before a game, the car ride conversations that sound more like performance reviews than encouragement.

The Role of the Mental Game

The mental game isn’t just for college or pro athletes—it’s what keeps kids in love with the game.

When young athletes learn to:

Manage pressure
Reframe mistakes
Regulate their nervous system
Focus on effort and growth instead of perfection

…they not only perform better—they enjoy it again.

The problem is, many athletes never get these tools early enough. They’re taught to train their bodies, not their minds. So when the pressure grows, their passion can’t keep up.

What Parents Can Do

As parents, you play the most powerful role in keeping your athlete connected to what matters most.Not by pushing harder—but by helping them rediscover why they started.

Here’s how to start:

1. Shift from Results to Relationships

Ask questions that show interest in their experience, not the scoreboard.

“Did you have fun today?”
“What did you learn about yourself?”
“Who did you connect with?”

When you emphasize curiosity over correction, you protect the emotional connection to the sport.

2. Help Them See Mistakes as Data, Not Drama

Mistakes are feedback. Pressure is information. Both are part of growth. Help your athlete notice what went well, what they can adjust, and what’s out of their control.

When kids stop fearing mistakes, confidence naturally returns.

3. Model Composure, Not Control

Your athlete reads your nervous system. If you get tense, they feel it.Try breathing deeply before games. Show calm after tough losses. Let your athlete know: “I love watching you play.”

That single sentence can change how they process pressure.

4. Reignite the Joy

Find ways to reconnect your athlete with fun—unstructured play, different teammates, or just a break. Play is still the foundation of passion. Without it, performance becomes a job.

The Takeaway

Kids rarely quit because they stop caring.They quit because caring starts to hurt.

When we help them reconnect with joy, manage pressure, and build a healthy relationship with challenge, they don’t just play longer—they grow stronger.

Your role isn’t to remove the struggle. It’s to help them navigate it—with curiosity, perspective, and love.

Because in the end, it’s not about raising perfect players. It’s about raising resilient humans who can handle pressure—and still smile through it.